It’s been over a month since my last post here. It’s been only a little less time since I put any serious time into writing. And yet I think about it every day, multiple times a day. I’m not exactly sure why I stopped writing. I know part of it was being tired. I was tired of the daily posts, status updates, and whatnot. I live with a strange dichotomy within myself in that part of me desperately wants and needs to express myself either through my writing or some other creative means, and an almost equal part of me wants to keep my thoughts and feelings to myself. This is something I have always struggled with. At least I think so. It certainly feels that way.

I’ve got just over 30k words for my NaNo novel. And I’m just kind of stuck. Not because I don’t know what happens next. I do. I’ve been thinking about that a whole lot during this extended break. I’m not sure why I haven’t sat down to keep going then. I know I really don’t like the current scene. It feels off for some reason. I’m tempted to skip ahead and write another part then eventually fill in the missing stuff. Thing is I’ve written both of my full length novels sequentially. I’m not sure how jumping around will turn out for me. But maybe it’s time to give it a shot.

Regardless, this kind of lull in my writing has been pretty scary. I question myself daily whether or not I really have the drive and ability to make this my living. There’s no question it’s going to be a long, slow road to even moderate success. Still, this is the hardest I’ve ever been hit by the doubt demons. Here’s hoping I can power through.